Why do I keep my eraser next to me while I study?
I'm hoping some of it rubs off on me.
Exhibit № 1 · The School Wing
The School Wing
Classroom-certified. Safe to retell at recess. 20 original exhibits — tap a setup for its punchline.
Why was the marker so nervous in the principal's office?
It didn't want anything on its permanent record.
Exhibit № 2 · The School Wing
Why couldn't I ever finish the library book about mazes?
I kept getting lost in it.
Exhibit № 3 · The School Wing
Which letters behave the best in the school library?
The silent ones.
Exhibit № 4 · The School Wing
Why did the judge go back to elementary school?
She really missed recess.
Exhibit № 5 · The School Wing
Why did the hall monitor stop the sentence?
It was a run-on.
Exhibit № 6 · The School Wing
Why did the letter Y sit alone at the vowel club meeting?
It's only a member sometimes.
Exhibit № 7 · The School Wing
Why did the fraction get a C for effort?
Everything it did was half-hearted.
Exhibit № 8 · The School Wing
What did the odd number do after losing the math contest?
It added one and got even.
Exhibit № 9 · The School Wing
Why did the geometry teacher miss school today?
She sprained her angle.
Exhibit № 10 · The School Wing
What do you call the fern that sits at the front of the classroom?
The teacher's plant.
Exhibit № 11 · The School Wing
Why don't I believe half the stories my gym teacher tells?
They're always a stretch.
Exhibit № 12 · The School Wing
Why did the dodgeball champion do so badly on the oral exam?
He dodged every question.
Exhibit № 13 · The School Wing
Why did the football get stopped in the hallway?
It didn't have a hall pass.
Exhibit № 14 · The School Wing
Why did my dog eat my essay before I finished writing it?
He only eats ruff drafts.
Exhibit № 15 · The School Wing
Why did Dad insist on giving the surprise test himself?
He said only a pop can give a pop quiz.
Exhibit № 16 · The School Wing
My band teacher told me to go home and practice my scales.
So I weighed myself twice.
Exhibit № 17 · The School Wing
Why did the cafeteria tray try out for the school choir?
It knew it could carry a tune.
Exhibit № 18 · The School Wing
Why was there a sandwich sitting at the teacher's desk today?
It was the substitute.
Exhibit № 19 · The School Wing
I asked my dad to help me with my homework.
He handed me a mop and said the home could use some work.
Exhibit № 20 · The School Wing
More wings: The Classics Hall · The Cafeteria · The Zoo Wing · The Science Lab · The Office Wing · The Garage · The Great Outdoors · The Seasonal Gallery